Our Services
You are not alone.
The loss of a baby is a profoundly painful experience that many families carry quietly each day. Connecting with others who have experienced a similar loss can provide comfort and understanding, and helps grieving parents feel seen, less alone, and reassured that the wide range of emotions they are experiencing is both valid and shared.
Whether it's been one day or five years since the loss of your baby, Share has support available for you. We offer support in a variety of ways, so you may choose the right fit for you: in person support, online chats, Companion support, packets of healing resources, parent comfort kits, and memorial events you can participate in person, or virtually. Share's support is free and always confidential.
Find Support Today
For phone support, please call the National Office: we are here for you with a listening ear, gentle support, and helpful resources to help you navigate this journey.
Additional Support Through the National Office
National Office In-Person Support Groups: for families in the St. Louis Metropolitan area
In-person support groups are held at the National Office on three Tuesdays each month, from 7-9pm CT
2nd Tuesday: This meeting is for bereaved parents seeking support and connection with other parents grieving the loss of their baby
3rd Tuesday: This meeting is for parents who are pregnant after a loss, or growing their family through pregnancy, adoption, or surrogacy.
4th Tuesday: This meeting is for parents who have recently had a baby after a loss, and would like support in parenting through grief.
For more information, please contact Jenn Stachula at jstachula@nationalshare.org. Jenn is the group leader and will reach out with additional information, and can answer any questions you may have.
Zoom: for parents across the nation
Please join us over Zoom for a support meeting, on the third Monday of each month at 11am CT. Please contact Cindy Swain at cswain@nationalshare.org for more information. Due to the sensitive nature of these groups, please do not bring children or babies with you to our in-person or virtual groups.
Chat: for parents across the nation
If you would prefer to connect with other parents online in a moderated chat, please explore our online support opportunities. A chat meeting is held every Tuesday of the month, covering a variety of topics. Please feel free to join in any chat that feels right for you.
Confidentiality: for everyone, everywhere
The privacy of our families is of utmost important to us. Our services are confidential and we will never share personal or private information without consent. You can trust we will hold your stories in the gentlest hands.
Support
Everyone grieves differently; we can help you find the support unique to your needs. Whether your loss was recent or in years past, we are here for you. If you need someone to talk to, please call us at 1-800-821-6819.
Remembrance
The national Share office hosts 10 free memorial events a year. We understand families need to continue to love, honor, and remember their baby. Click here to see events.
Education
Share provides comprehensive perinatal bereavement care training for caregivers, healthcare professionals, Funeral Directors, bereaved families, Share Chapter leaders, and other caregivers. Learn More
Share Español: Esperanza
Bienvenidos a Share Español: Esperanza. Este grupo de apoyo ha sido creado para servir a familias de habla Hispana a afrontar el duro proceso de duelo debido a la trágica pérdida del bebé durante el embarazo, antes del nacimiento o durante los primeros meses de vida.
La misión principal es la de brindar apoyo, comprensión y sobre todo esperanza a toda familia afectada por esta terrible pérdida.
Programs for you and your family, too
A parent’s love for their child does not end. At Share, we understand that ongoing support and opportunities to remember and honor their baby are essential parts of a parent’s grief and healing journey. Our programs are designed to help parents honor their love, remember in community, and heal with peers walking a similar path. And our support doesn't stop with helping parents: we are here for the entire family, as well as your friends and community. Explore Share's many programs to find the support that is right for you.
Share was established in 1977, and has partnered with hospitals, community organizations and bereaved parents nationwide to establish a strong network of perinatal bereavement programs that span the country. Share supports our national community with weekly online support group meetings, moderated parent Facebook pages, mulitple social platforms, an online Sharing Magazine, and free parent and professional grief support resource packets.
Companions are bereaved parents trained by Share educators, who are available to provide an extra layer of support to newly bereaved parents after a loss. The Share Companion program exists to provide peer support in the hospital at the time of a loss, through phone support, online support and attending support groups and memorial events. Contact Cindy Swain, Director of Bereavement Care, cswain@nationalshare.org, if you are interested in being a Companion or starting a Companion program.
Share distributes more than 5,000 free informational packets and brochures annually. Share regularly updates and creates new materials, as well as working to help inform our Share chapters with new available resources. Bereavement programs nationwide purchase Share materials to help support families. Share materials are an excellent resource families and available in English and Spanish.
When a baby dies, grandparents grieve the loss of their grandchild, but also for the grief and pain that their own child is experiencing. Grandparents experience many of the same emotions as the parents, but often their focus is not on their own emotions, but on their adult children that are grieving. To be strong for their children can lead grandparents to mourn and grieve their grandchild on their own, often without support. Share provides phone support for grandparents, printed resources specific to their grief, a local event recognizing the complex role of bereaved grandparents, as well as trained Companions who have also experienced the loss of their grandchild. If you or someone you love is grieving the loss of their grandchild, please reach out to Share for resources and support.
Share provides comfort kits to parents who have experienced a loss to provide hope and healing during the darkest days. These special boxes are available at burials, support groups and other Share events. The sibling bags are backpacks filled with items designed to help children cope with the loss of a brother or sister. If you would like more information, or to request one for yourself or a loved one, please reach out to Share at info@nationalshare.org.
Frequently Asked Questions
Parents
What can I do to memorialize my baby?
No matter how far along you were when your baby died, having a memorial for them can be a way to express your love and provide a way for family and friends to have a remembrance of your baby.
You can also get a special piece of jewelry or a tattoo, put together a shadow box of their ultrasound photo and other items, or get an ornament each year in their memory. There are so many things you can do to make new traditions that include your precious baby. Want more ideas? Reach out to Rose at rcarlson@nationalshare.org.
How can I get through this?
When your baby dies at any stage of pregnancy or as a newborn, you are likely to experience a wide array of emotions ranging from shock to numbness to anger and everything in between. Share offers resources such as booklets and brochures that explain the many emotions you may feel and go through in the coming days, weeks, and months. All of us at Share are here to help you in any way we can. We offer in person and online support groups, memorial events that you can participate in in person or virtually, and phone support if you need someone to talk to.
What can I do to help my children who were looking forward to a new baby?
The death of a baby can have a profound impact on children. Children experience two losses when a baby dies: The death of the sibling they were looking forward to as well as the "death" of the parent they had before the baby died. Children have different understandings of death based on their age, and Share has resources to help you explain what happened to your children. For a Children's Grief brochure or list of books for children about the loss of a sibling, contact the Share office.
My friend lost her baby, how can I help?
When a loved one experiences the death of a baby during pregnancy or as a newborn, friends and family may want to help, but they often do not know what to say or how to help. The best thing you can do is be there to listen and support your loved one. Let them know you care and are thinking of them. Share offers a brochure called Ways to Support a Parent Whose Baby has Died that can offer tips for ways you can support your loved one who has experienced this tragic loss. Contact Share or request a packet of information through our website for this brochure and other resources.
Is the loss of a baby in pregnancy or shortly after birth an unusual occurrence?
Perinatal loss (miscarriage, stillbirth, infant death) is a far more common experience than people realize. One in every four pregnancies end in miscarriage. Approximately one in 160 pregnancies ends in stillbirth. And of every 100 live births, one baby will die in the first 28 days of life (neonatal death).
Caregivers
What opportunities does Share offer for education?
Share provides comprehensive perinatal bereavement care training for caregivers, healthcare professionals, funeral directors, bereaved families, and Share Chapter leaders. Check out our education page.
Does Share offer resources in Spanish?
Yes, absolutely. For more information on all of our Spanish services, please visit https://nationalshare.org/share-espanolesperanza/
What should I not say to someone who has lost a baby?
A good question, as many things we say hoping to give comfort can actually be hurtful instead of helpful. Try to avoid these statements:
"At least you were not that far along."
"At least you didn't take the baby home."
"At least you have another child."
"Everything happens for a reason."
"But you can have another baby."
"Now you have an Angel in heaven."
"God would never give you more than you can handle."
"Better to happen now before you knew the baby."
At Share, we like to say that anything that starts with the phrase "at least" is usually dismissive of a parent's feelings, and can lead them to feeling more isolated and alone.
Supporting Share
Is Share a non-profit?
Yes, Share is a 501c3 nonprofit and relies on the generosity of individuals, companies and foundations to provide services free of charge to every family seeking grief support.
Can I host my own fundraiser?
Absolutely! Contact Emily Swain to find out how to host your own event, eswain@nationalshare.org. Some common events are kickball tournaments, neighborhood progressive dinners, a car wash, casual dress day at work, themed holiday parties, or a social media birthday fundraiser.
I can't give a large amount but how can I make an impact for Share?
Every gift is significant to Share and makes a huge difference to the families we serve. Make a one-time gift or consider joining our monthly giving club. Click here to join or give.
Why should I give to the Endowment Fund?
Making an endowed gift is one of the most powerful ways to have a lasting impact on Share. It creates stability for Share to stay intact through financial hardships and instills fiscal responsibility by alleviating pressure on the annual fund. The great part is that the endowment is invested and can grow over time, allowing us to fulfill our mission for years to come.
For more information, contact Jessie Bruckerhoff, Accounting & Business Director, at jbruckerhoff@nationalshare.org